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There Won't Be Any Christmas If The Mayans Are Right!

by Bert Susanka & The Astronaut Love Triangle

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1.
Christmas Day and New Year's are just around the corner Don't say I didn't warn you but it might not come this year or even next year, or even the year after, no sounds of joy and laughter full of holiday cheer 'cause long, long ago, these people called the Mayans who looked just like Hawaiians without those loud Hawaiian shirts with printed flowers, they counted down the hours and minutes and the seconds till the last day here on Earth They wrote down in their calendar the day that we expire now it's "oops, party over, out of time" from deep within their Mayan ruins Christmas will be ruined by the Mayans almost overnight and there won't be any Christmas if the Mayans are right. I wonder how they'll do it? Did a Mayan god say, "Screw it! These humans with their Facebook status updates and their Tweets They nauseate me, they're really going to hate me when their smart phones burst in flames creating panic in the streets. Then lightning bolts will spring from Chichen Itza while choking down their pizzas at the local mall, then tall and evil spacemen will greet the human race and present us with a cook book. aptly titled "To Serve Man" They'll overrun the planet all because the way we ran it didn't satisfy the gods in all their might from deep within their Mayan ruins Christmas will be ruined by the Mayans, what a dreadful sight and there won't be any Christmas if the Mayans are right. Forget about Thanksgiving cause here comes Black Friday December 21st also falls on a Friday December 21st will be worse than Black Friday Even worse than Rebecca Black singing Friday People at the disco sing "Thank God, It's Friday" People at the disco sing "Thank God, It's Friday" People at the disco sing "Thank God, It's Friday" I think we kind of strayed from happens that Friday And when the day approaches, there'll nothing left but cockroaches and Hostess Twinkies, what a dreadful sight. From deep within their Mayan ruins we'll see Christmas ruined by the Mayans, almost over night so you better start to shout and you better start to cry and you better start to pout, I'm telling' you why there won't be any Christmas if the Mayans are right.
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Secret Santa 03:36
When Christmas time has gone away and Bond goes on a holiday Who's there to save the day? Secret Santa Red smoking jacket lined with fur His egg nog shaken, never stirred and femme fatales that purr for Secret Santa Double agents fear the man called "Kringle" with hi tech gadgets made by elves that decipher code, explode and jingle Children nestled in their beds Sugar plums dance in their heads They know nothing 'bout the Feds or the Secret Santa Here comes Santa Claus, there goes Santa in a shiny, red DB5 They say that Santa is one bad (shut your mouth) Just talkin' 'bout Santa (and we can dig it) You can be a counter intelligence hottie Doesn't need a wire tap to detect if you've been nice or you're naughty And even though he's a spy, he's an average Joe, Tom, Dick, Harry or Steve Well... except for that part where he climbs down your chimney on Christmas Eve So stay off of his "naughty" list or your Christmas gift will be a fist and you'll find that you've been missed didn't leave you any gifts but all the ladies have been kissed by the Secret Santa
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Blockhead 01:48
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Feed the squirrels, Let them know that Christian Slater's here!

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Happy Holidays from Bert Susanka & The Astronaut Love Triangle!

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released December 10, 2011

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Bert Susanka & The Astronaut Love Triangle Huntington Beach, California

The Astronaut Love Triangle are...

Bert Susanka- Lead Vocal, Guitar
Rob Perez- Guitars and other stringed gadgets, Keyboards (occassionally), Vocals
Adam Hankinson-Bass, Vocals
Jason O'Donnell-Drums and percussion

"Space Junk" Available NOW.. right here!
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